Home discussions Divorce Reality Sets In

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    sharron
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    OMG – After seeing my lawyer today, any small amount of denial I had left that Steve really loved me and wanted to take care of me financially is now only a by-gone fantasy.
    I knew in my heart when he begged over and over again, on Sunday,not to follow through with the divorce was only once again one of his manipulations and dollar signs flashing before his eyes – I was right.
    My attorney called him today, and he asked her if the notarized affidavit to pay me $600./mo was legal. She told him it is. She got the gut feeling he is not going to be as cooperative as he said. That kind of says it all, doesn’t it! All of his promises of wanting to take care of me were just another ploy to keep me. I actually was under the illusion he loved me in the best way he knew how and he wanted to get over his addiction, but couldn’t. How wrong was that?
    Anyway, there were some good things that came from my attorney and some bad ones. Now that he has purchased what was to be our home in the country, it was after our date of marriage and it becomes community property. He purchased the 1st one before marriage.This means if he wants to hold me accountable for half the mortgage payments and/or taxes he can do so. I don’t think he knows that, so it may be a mute point. God I hope this site is safe.
    She is absolutely sure the post-nump will hold up – no problem. She tells me the $600./mo is considered alimony and will only be in effect for 10 yrs. Should he die, before then, it stops. Apparently, the court will not continue to pay out, even if he signed that it would then be taken out of his estate. Not a good sign.
    We came up with three proposals:
    1. Pay me $600./mo and honor the postnump cash settlement. (Not my favorite).
    2. Pay off my Condo and honor the postnup cash settlement.
    3. Pay me a cash settlement of $100,000. and be done
    with it. Steve can do that by surrendering the $104,000.
    annuity to me, he initially promised, to cover the
    $600./mo and it will cover that amount for an approximate
    15 more yrs. life expectancy.
    I am opting for the Condo payoff ($56,000 that I still owe)
    the cash settlement of $30,000. upon divorce, pay off the car and adhere to the rest of the postnump – Insurance’s.
    He told her he does not want to cash in an annuity to pay me off, because he wants to keep them and have them continue to grow in value. Well, he can’t have it both ways – it is either put out the cash or surrender the annuity.
    I really think that after meeting with her next Tuesday, he will get his own attorney and fight this. But, that will cost him more money, and since he hasn’t sold his 1st house he may not be able to put out the money.
    Just had to get it all out. I just want this to be over and done with. Any feelings of empathy for this man have now turned to anger.
    The best I may get is the postnump aggreement. If that is all, then so be it – I will be free of this man’ greed, lies, manipulation and addiction. I may have to get even, though. Told ya all about that in another post. I don’t go down easily. Of course it will all be within the letter of the law.
    Thanks for listening. Any ideas, anyone? Hope this all makes sense

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