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Hi All,
Finally figuring out the navigation on the site.
Hey, it would be helpful to me to hear some of the ‘standard lines’ and phrases that SAH’s use:
I hear the following:
– you have such an overactive imagination
– what kind of a person do you think I am
– I had post partum depression after birth of third daughter and other comments I hear are often insinuating that I have a mental health condition bordering on psychosis.Please add …
Hi, Zoey! So many variations on that theme of “I’m not the problem, you are”…
You are too dependent on me.
I am not responsible for your emotions.
You have abandonment issues.
You are critical and controlling.
You need to take responsibility for your part of the problem.
Nothing I do will ever be good enough for you.
You’ll never trust me again no matter what I do.
You are mentally unstable.
You have rage issues.
I am afraid for my safety with you and need a witness.
I am like a Boy Scout.
It’s not like I’m a child molester.I better stop now because I could do this all day…
I have also and currently get subtle references to:
– my weight
– my ageing
– my eating
– how I smell
– how much money I spend and on whatI tell you, writing it all down feels very bittersweet: sad and empowering all at the same time!
“you’re too sensitive”
“You’re trying to control me when you share your feelings”
“I don’t know what you want from me”
“I dont want to hurt their ( other women’s) feelings”
“I don’t feel safe in this relationship”
“You don’t really feel that way( way I have just said I feel), you feel this way”( way it’s more convenient for him for me to feel)
“What about me?”
“How do you think I feel?”
“You are most of the problem in this relationship”I feel less crazy. Thank you, Zoey.
You all have covered the basics 🙂
I just stopped listening when the sun coming up was my fault..I catch on quick 🙂
I can’t win – no matter what I say it’s wrong, so what’s the point?
You left – what’s left to lose?
This isn’t an illness I chose
I can’t stop the bubble
If you’d done xyz
The bloody dishwasher was stacked wrong and I couldn’t deal with it…it’s never enough
you treat me like i’m not a person
you’re shaming me
everyone else thinks i’m going greatAnd the winner is……drumroll….
The bloody dishwasher was stacked wrong and I couldn’t deal with it…
That is it in a nutshell ladies. Thank you Jos 🙂
You know you are in trouble when your SAH says “she’s just a friend”. That’s the beginning of the end. (or the end of the beginning).
I never had an affair.
I took my vows seriously.
I wouldn’t have acted out so much if you had been nicer.
I go to Brazil to relax. I deserve to travel once per year.– You always loved me more than I loved you.
– I didn’t think we were ‘exclusive’ for 9 years. (Biggest WTF for me)
– I swear from the bottom of my heart, I have never physically cheated on you.
– I have told you everything now.
– I just prefer the strippers’ vaginas. Don’t have to take it personally or be upset and angry at me.
– We didn’t hug enough.
– My parents are so supportive to me. (His number one enablers)
– My love for you has become detached.
– It took a guy from my meeting 5 years to get any sobriety, it takes time OK?
– I’m at a crossroads, you or my addiction, not sure which direction is best.
– The guys at my meeting aren’t judgmental like you are.
– My sponsor said I had to put up with your abuse. It’s normal for partners to be abusive.
– My life is screwed anyway so what’s the point.
– I did it because I’m a sex addict.
– You’re trying to DESTROY me.Goodness – I think I’ve heard most on this list…
just have to add…
its not like I drink or smoke or anything…
I thought that this outlet was saving our marriage because it was a good way to get rid of my excessive energy…
Its nothing personal…
Money is leaking out of my account like water – I just dont understand what you are spending it on…FFS!!!!!
“Money is leaking out of my account like water – I just dont understand what you are spending it on…”
And Jos wins again! keep ’em coming Jos 🙂
Oh bev dont!
And I still have days when I wonder if I did the right thing asking him to leave?! WTF!I think I am insane!
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