Ok, so no support at all, not just less

It’s not child support, it’s alimony that SJ is supposed to pay. They don’t garnish alimony. My children are from a previous marriage, they were 14 and 9 when we married.

And believe me, LOTS of dads get away without paying child support. They just have to be a step ahead of the sluggish enforcement systems. Here in NC the first piece of paper you have to sign if you ask for help with child support enforcement is an agreement that you realize it takes a minimum of 3 months to start a claim. Then, once they’ve located the non-paying parent, allow another 60 days for the garnishments, etc. to be put into place. And that’s IF they remain in the enforcing state. If they move, all the red tape is doubled because the state on the receiving end of the file claims the same timetable for themselves. Basically, for enforcement to work, the dad has to care about staying put and keeping the same job. Not what my children’s dad cares about, part of why I left him. We moved 27 times in 10 years. Work related, yes, but still. He’s 80K+ behind now.

He deposited support, less $300, late yesterday. Sigh. So tired. It’s a relief, but still leaves us very short. Somethings got to break. Hope it’s not me.

Oh, I will, Kimberly. I’ll have to. But I’m pretty sure that means I’ll have to travel to TX for the court date. That cost me over $1000 last time, and at that time SJ was glad to see me and paid all the expenses once I got there. I don’t know if that will be more expensive for me than the attorney to represent me. Today, I am too mentally fried to research that.

It’s not a court ordered support, it’s a separation agreement, so no judge signed it. I have to file for breach of contract, and then that will create a court order, if the judge orders him to pay what he owes per the contract (which my attorney says every judge does with these things). Once SJ failes to pay the court ordered amount, THEN I can file again and he will be held in contempt if he doesn’t pay, and jailed if he doesn’t pay by the deadline the contempt hearing decides. With his first wife, when he was found in contempt, they gave him 60 days to pay the amount he was behind.

Which means, he can not pay for one month.. and then it takes about a month or two to get a court date… and then he can have two months to make it right (not paying all this while). He can get six months behind before he is legally forced to pay the first months arrearage. Meanwhile I will have had to make three filings of once month’s support. And then I’ll have to file for the NEXT months arrearage, and they’ll give him only 30 days to come clean. And so on, sigh.

Just so not worth the effort. I really, really just wanted to find a job. Still looking.

NC, he’s in Texas, where they’re not really adamant about enforcing support anyway.

I think I get where you are going. Have him forced to come here. THat would be less expensive at the first, but I know from experience with the children’s father, if he isn’t paying a contempt amount here, they will NOT go get him and put him in jail in TX. He needs that threat to move, I know from experience.

Argh, that’s good and bad. I know they won’t enforce across state lines. I’ve tried that so many times with the children’s father. They basically laugh at me and say, what do you want us to do? Go get him four states away? Not happening.

Hmmmm