For real — this is the conversation had….

Hello all. I wanted to share something that exsah called me about re: his current “state” of addiction and his therapist. He obviously still thinks I care. I mean I do, but not like when I lived with him. I no longer feel responsible for him.

So it goes like this. I had a car problem last night. Me and Jacqleen were waiting for a tow truck. I was totally stressed, and worried. Called for her dad to come pick her up, as it looked like I would not have transportation to take her to school.

No answer, no nuttin. Anyway, the car issue was resolved by an angel of a security guard who resolved it and Jacqleen and I go home. And I’m like wtf? I had tried to reach him to help us for hour and a half.

Well he finally calls back, and “he was at a meeting, coudn;’t take calls.” He is driving. And slurring his words. Obviously under the influence. I tell him its noticeable, he should not be driving. And why was he going to meetings if he’s just going to use afterward> makes no sense.

Anyway, I went to bed. Just so disappointed, that yes indeed, this was my child’s father.

Well here’s the clincher. Of course he calls at work today guilt ridden. Why? I said no criticisms no nothing. We are not together. His decisions do not directly impact me anymore.

Well get this . A whole completely selfish diatribe, (I hardly listened) but it went like what a great Dad he is, his daughter plays piano because of him, he’s a good provider. AND ACCORDING TO HIS THERAPIST HE IS NEITHER SEX ADDICT OR OTHER TYPE OF ADDICT. HE JUST LIKES CERTAIN KINDS OF SEX. AND HIS ALOCHOL USE IS MINIMAL. SO HE CAN ENJOY IT TO RELAX WHEN HE IS STRESSED. LAST NIGHT HE HAD 2 DRINKS AND VALIUM. THAT’S WHY HE WAS SLURRING. HE IS TIRED OF FEELING BAD ABOUT HIMSELF AND DISAPPOINTING ME. HE COULD TELL I WAS ASHAMED OF HIM.

I am ashamed of how he chooses to live his life. No doubt. But that’s my business. I have no interest in discussing with him.

Another wonderful therapist. I mean really? This guy actually believes this stuff. He actually believes it, as his life goes down the drain, and he continues to be an addict. As well as an abuser. I mean, you should have heard him going on and on explaining about what he likes sexually. I told him to stop, he was not respecting my boudnaries as I have no need to hear about his desires. He continued on, and told me listen to he’s ready to stop. Absolutely no acknowledgment of any pain it may be causing me. I put the phone down, let him ramble. And carry on in my office. then pick up the phone every once in awile and say “I see.

We ended the conversation with a “I am glad you had this reveleation btw you and yourself. That’s great. have a good day.

I had absolutely no reaction. What a guild ridden, addicted, denying, lying, projectile vomit inducing man. Oooh, if only the bottoming process would hurry up and come. Let him go down to where he needs to go. Even if it means death. It least it would be a resolve to the behavior.

Incredible.