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Hey all! I saw my STBX at a support hearing recently. He did not even acknowledge me or even look in my direction and we sat right across the hall from each other. He looks like he has aged 10 years in 6 months. I mean awful. Does anyone have any insight as to why he would not look at me or speak to me? We were in the hall for 2 hours. I’m not sad about it, I’m just wondering what the heck? That is not normal behavior. We were married for 27 years and have 4 adult children. Its just more strange behavior. Maybe its better for me?
I think it’s so awkward they don’t know what else to do.
When I showed up at my H’s sentencing hearing last week (he didn’t know I was going to be there) he looked right at me when I came through the door. When we all left he came up to me and said “when did you get here?” He never looked at me the entire time we were in the courtroom.
I think it is better for us. At least me anyway. I’d rather not look at him! And my H looks awful too. Very thin, pale and looks a lot older. Not my problem 🙂
Maybe their double life is catching up to them? I was just amazed at how old and drawn he looked. Maybe he has aged because he can’t play with his willy anymore .LOLOLOLOLOL
Okay explain this. One day about a month ago I saw my x at his house and he looked really good, dressed nice, etc…then I saw him the same day 4 hrs later at his house and he looked like shit and crazy. You couldn’t even tell they were the same person?!??
WTF :/
Honestly it is hard to figure out the whys with these guys. They are not dealing off the same deck as us. I am always hurt when I see mine whether he looks good or bad. Whether he tries to get me back or not (lately only the not).
I am guessing they have a whole lot of guilt and shame. Hard to look a person in the eye you lied to. Hard to look at us because we remind them of the shame. Too bad there isn’t enough shame to stop them. They have no morale compass, no integrity.
Bottom line it sucks that we are connected to these people.
dr e and I don’t talk when we are at court. We both have our attorneys and he usually has a cheering section of my in-laws- FIL, MIL, 2 SIL and at least one BIL. Sometimes a friend or 2 also. They all just sit and glare at me. Good times. Why would they all take time out of their lives to do that? Whatever. I started bringing friends with me, too, just so it didn’t look like he was Mr. Popular and so I had moral support. It’s a frickin’ circus. I hate it. Bottom line is it is ALL about them.
Cede. You are right on with the shame thing. I’m sure we are a reminder oh we’ll too bad for them! Teri. Why am I not surprised about doc e. If you ever need someone to sit with you and stare him down, I’m in!
I am glad that your sah looked awful.. mine has put on 20 pounds in the last six months and I think it is great.. too bad… I guess he is too busy with his beloved penis activities to work out or really to think about anything else at all.. I wish his would stop working.. that would be great.. but if he looked awfulll ?? hahahahaha on him.. I hope he gains more weight over the holidays.. I keep making cookies .. and encouraging him to eat them.. eat away pervert.. pack away those calories.. ha
It’s hard to look normal when you aren’t. Unless, of course, you have a coverup. We were the coverup. Without us, the normal mask is tough to keep on.
Agree to the cover up thing. My soon to be ex already found another regular girlfriend. He had to have a cover up. I am pretty sure she does not know about the “extra” activities. I feel sorry for her. Hopefully it doesn’t figure it out after over 20 years.
In the end at least we can hold our heads high!Lynn, I don’t know if you meant to be funny. ” Its hard to look normal when you’re not”. I love it! LOLOLOL
yep they sure do….it’s sad but funny at the same time. Oh well, I guess he will have to figure out another front, maybe his new girl. I’m just glad its not me.
Whenever I hear about an SA looking terrible I think it must be all the ugly inside leaking out through the cracks. If Karma had her act together they would all just melt into a smelly puddle of ooze. 🙂
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