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As most of you know, my divorce was finalized on Valentines Day. My xh was given a set of paper to sign so money etc could be divided. He was to turn them in to his L the next day. It’s going on 3 weeks and his L is calling him, has sent him certified letters he’s not responding to. My L left me a message we may need to file a court motion. ($$$).
What is he doing now and what shoud I do? I won’t talk to him so that’s not an option. Why is he doing this do you think?
All comments are welcome and appreciated.
its his last effort to control, thats what i think off the top. he thinks if i dont sign the papers he wins. what i have no idea in the long run it will cost him money. ask lawyer if you file motion shouldnt he have to pay her fees because there is no reason not to sign it only to cause you more heartache also can his lawyer be sued some way?
NAP – Isn’t it amazing how when it comes down to money, these guys are complete dicks. I agree with Katt-it is his last effort to control, and obviously he is angry. I agree with Katt. He should have to pay attorney fees.
My SA, all of a sudden, decided to tell me he has to pay $40,000. in taxes this year and $100,000. next year. Of course he knew that when he agreed to the $500./mo. I don’t think he ever had any intention of paying in the 1st place- I am sure hewas just hoping the divorce would not go through. Now, he is saying-“attorney fee’s and moving expenses.” YA, he knew that too. Then, now he is saying, “I will take care of you.” Doesn’t sound like it.
Sorry you are having to go through this. My attorney told me one time that a certified letter shows he has been notified. If he refuses to sign, then why can’t your attorney just file a motion for this thing to go through whether he signs or not. At least that is how it is in Ks. and Mo. If I remember correctly, isn’t all of that in the divorce decree?Damn NAP, that sucks. Wish I had some legal advice for you (I’m just a ‘doctor’, though). Thinking of you and hoping this madness will end soon. Love, Liza
Dear Nap,
sorry for your struggle. There is never an action or behavior with these guys without some kind of motive or intention that benefits THEMSELVES. He is stalling for some reason, whether that has legal ground or not, I don’t know. but wb good to check into, if he has been notified, and everything was set to go, and HE is purposely holding it up, only seems fair he should pay court costs. ask your attorney, at this point your L is the only one you can even remotely trust. just keep doing the right thing…keep it moving.
is he alive i dont know has anyone seen or talked to him. sorry not to upset you but didnt he play the suicide card
I agree with Katt… control.
If it was prdered for him to do it in the divorce decree, it is contempt. And you’re right… $$$$. You can ask that he be ordered to pay your lawyer costs on a contempt. That’s not saying you’ll get it.
Well, NAP, it just really stinks.
But I think you have learned the hard way that talking to him is pointless, since it just means you spend money and his lawyer tears it up. I suspect, however, he hoping you will chase him. Don’t.
Leave this one to the lawyers. And if you can, go for the juggler and demand he pay. Even if the judge doesn’t find contempt, I certainly do.
So sorry, NAP. But it will be over. very soon.Sounds like one last ditch effort. Stand your ground. He’s too cowardly to commit suicide, he’s just trying to scare you. Do NOT talk to him. Let the lawyers figure it out, that’s what you have them for. We love you very much, so much that your hand is all sweaty from all of us holding it tight.
Much love, Claire
My God….these guys. I agree with all said. Try to shut this down Nap, BUT don’t deal with him directly. If he offs himself…well that isn’t your problem anymore. Enough already I say. Thinking of you…u are almost there dear girl.
Thank you all for your kind messages and support. Out of all the men in the world, how did I pick this one? He’s a F ing mess and he’s nonstop.
Geez give me a F ing break. He pisses me off, sorry I’m really frustrated right now. He better not pop over like he was doing before the final divorce, I WILL call the cops.
I’m calling my L back on Monday, he’s paying for everything related to this latest chaos or it’s pro bono. I’m not giving these people anymore $$$$. I’m so done.
I may have to do retail therapy today!
Love you all bunches and bunches xxoo, Nap
He is acting just like a bully. The only way a bully goes away is to ignore him. I agree… let the lawyers handle it. You should cut absolute contact with him. Prmise yourslf from this day forward, you will never say a word to he man.
Katt,
Thanks for thinking of me and YES I picked them up today. He will need to sign a few more so hopefully he will be more prompt. But today I got my quick claim deed to my house so it’s just all mine alone and also I am now the owner of his $500,000 life insurance policy which I pay the premium of $379 a month, it’s so high because he’s been a smoker since age 12. I had many people adviser to do this because unfortunately they dont see him living really long. Sad but true. It kinda makes me feel weird bits it’s the reality of the situation.
Love, Nap
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