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Hello all,
Well – just when things started to calm down a bit…
This morning my SAH got a 30 day performance plan at work. He knew it was coming he just thought it might be in a few months as he just closed an important deal. He has been struggling with his job of 2 years since Day 1. Not sure if it’s his epilepsy (he has confusion and memory issues) or his SA stuff – or likely a combination.
He has a big chunk of stock that vests on July 31 but the plan says that they can terminate him at any time during the 30 days so he is crapping it. We don’t have a huge amount of savings – and I only have a part-time job.
So – please pray that we can get through this storm. He asked his doctor a few weeks ago to give him a release for disability – which he wouldn’t do until his neuropsych. test which is on July 20. Yuck.
He is getting an employment lawyer to see what his options are.
I guess this will motivate me to get my resume in order. Sigh.
Deb
God knows I’m spending enough time on the line with God these days so I will add you to my list 🙂
Dear Deb,
Does this mean your husband is losing his job in 30 days or being evaluated for his job performance or what? I am sorry to hear that. You don’t need that on top of everything else. If he does lose it…could you move east as you once said you would prefer. I hope he gets the stock at least.
Karen xxThanks all…yes, he is losing his job in 30 days. Writing has been on the wall. He hasn’t been focusing on work much…and it isn’t the right job for him given the effects of his epilepsy, etc.
I would love to move to nc but given that all his experience is in high tech we might have to stay in CA. I really want to check out Wilmington NC..I told a friend of mine about it and she flew down there last week and looked at houses and schools and is likely going to move there soon. I hope to follow her! (her husband is an alcoholic…so we were talking about starting a family compound).
Anyone have any experience with Wilmington, nc? We all love the beach and hubby is a big golfer. We nearly moved to chapel hill (no beach) and charleston sc in the past few years but the stars didn’t align.
Deb
I lived in Chapel Hill for a while ten years ago, back then it was overpriced and the people were NOT your typical welcoming southerners. There is really big money there, and the have’s and have not’s areas are apparent immediately and keep their distance. There is more to do in the Raleigh/Durham area, which is really only 30 minutes down the road. More affordable housing there, too. But crime is high for NC. The schools are dreadful. I homeschooled the whole time we lived there. It is one of the largest homeschool communities in the nation.
Wilmington is a lot of fun, and has grown a lot in the last few years. The beach is nice, but small and you have to get there early to get parking. In the last few years, there has been a lot of growth inland and on the waterfront in Wilmington. There is a booming arts community, and the people are friendlier. It has a health conscious, younger feel than Chapel Hill. Almost like Asheville with a beach.
Golf and beach are great in Little River, SC, about an hour south of Wilmington. It is not as commercial, but has lots of beautiful communities where properties can be had very inexpensively. There is lots of access to waterways for boating and fishing, too, but you have to drive about 20 mins to get to a beach access. My aunt and uncle live there.
Charleston is overcrowded and overpriced, from what I’ve seen in the last three years. I used to love it, I don’t like going there so much, now. It feels dirtier and less charming than in the past. Maybe that’s just me and my new “awareness”.
Lynn,
What are your thoughts about Ashville? I’ve thought of moving there once my kids are settled. Thanks, NapDeb,
I’m sorry to hear about your h job loss. You really have a lot on your plate right now…..are you okay? This is too much !!!Love, Nap
PS. Having TLE is difficult to live with, for the person who has it and their love ones.
I’m really sorry to hear it is a done deal though I do remember you saying his job was at risk. Very scary to lose the main bread winner when you have kids. Sounds like your H is well qualified to find something else but the uncertainty is not very nice. Hang in there, Deb. Surely you deserve a silver lining. Karen xx
Thanks Karen and NAP. I think he’s going to try and go on short term disability – that way we will at least get 60% of his pay and medical insurance and it will give him time to find the next job. It’s been difficult for him to do this job (I’d love to know what % is his epilepsy and what is his SA/PD anxiety). His neurologist is out of the country – but his psychiatrist said he would approve it. I’m just hoping that his company doesn’t nix that since they gave him a performance plan. The good news is that he talked to HR about the disability several weeks before the “plan” today.
I guess the good news is that I won’t be as focused on his SA now. It’s a nice diversion. And it will hopefully give me the impetus to get a full-time job and become less reliant on him. I do know that I/we could never continue to live here in Marin (one of the most expensive counties in the nation) with four kids if his good income doesn’t continue.
Deb
Oh, Aptos, Dawn. Lucky you to live there..I love that town! I love the whole central coast area. xoxo
I live in NC. I love Asheville, would live there in a heartbeat if I could. We go there at least once every six weeks. It has become much more commercial and expensive, but still it’s a fantastic place to hang out. Don’t know about housing, there doesn’t seem to be much close in to town.
The Grove Park Inn on Merrimon Ave is a world of indulgence unto itself. And the Biltmore Estate is fabulous, but that, too, has been touted as an international destination and so is way overpriced.
Lots of outdoor activities and arts activities to attend.
A bit of a hippie vibe, children and dogs walked in town and at events.
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