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Hi Sister’s – I am moving back to my Condo on Tuesday. Bet you all thought you would never hear that from me – at least this soon. I really need your support right now. It is tough, but I have to do it now.
It is really all so sad. Steve is not making it any easier for me. Crying a lot, and coming over hugging me and asking me not to do this.
He signed a piece of paper, which will be notorized this w/e that he will pay me $600./mo. My attorney just will not get back with me, so had to do something here.
The crowning glory for me (making the decision to do it now) was him objectifying his sister 3 X’s last Sunday.
He is still denying it was a trigger, because he maintains he looked away immediately. I just said to him if he has to look away from his sister after looking at her boobs while bending over just indicates he even has issues with her. I think one of my sisters said that family are genderless. Can’t remember who you were, but I don’t think it could have been put better.
The second thing was when we were out to dinner for my birthday. He was objectifying me like any other woman. I had dressed pretty sexy-form fitted dress with cleavage showing. (My 36DD’s). He got that weird look in his eyes when doing it, and it just re-inforced even more how he responds when objectifying other woman.
Anyway, I am shedding some tears, and if he would just leave me alone and quit playing on my emotions I will be fine.
The TV, Internet, phone service is set up for Wednesday. The movers are coming to pack on Monday, and will move me Tuesday.
I have such a sense of relief, but at the same time it is quite sad that a man such has Steve had every opportunity in the book, and then more, to make this right. The lieing continued, No disclosure, etc. Nothing done that an SA in recovery should be doing. The addiction won!
Anyway, here I go – moving on Tuesday. It is going to be very difficult over the w/e, or I should say very strained.
I’m doing it!!! I am proud of myself!!Bravo, Sharron. I think you’ve done as much as you could to achieve your goals and stay sane while doing it. I wish I could send a big bunch of tulips to your new place and have them waiting for you. Try imagining that when you walk in the door. We are all there, welcoming you home, cheering you on, hugging it better, and poking you when it seems needful. We are sisters. That’s what we do.
Now go and buy some new earrings.
much love,
diane.Diane-Just want to let you know you have been so inspiring to me over this last year. You know just the right things to say to make things better, and I love you for it.
Thanks for-now. Your words mean a lot, and it really helps in a time when one knows they made the right decision, but it is still tough.-HugsDear Sharron,
I am so glad that you are putting a plan in action. Wow! I am so proud of you for doing it so quickly. If at any point in our lives ever, we have to have faith that all will work out right. I am sorry he is making it more difficult. But Sharron, if any real recovery is going to happen for him, I beleive your leaving him will be the very thing to bring it round, if it is ever going to be.
But on to better things. Are you excited in a sense about your new life? I hope that you are.
I wish I was moving Tuesday. Ugh, I keep visualizing signig a lease and my divorce decree. I keep scouring the web looking at apts. it can’t happen fast enough, Sharron. It really can’t ! I am so happy that your exit has come. Nicely done.
YOU go Sharron! He was making you feel crazy. It is VERY hard but once it is over I cannot imagine you will feel worse than you have in the last year?? Good luck and we are all here.
Karen xxThank you kmf- I may need some real support in the next week or so. I do feel somewhat at peace now, even though it is difficult. Once I get out of here and back into my own place I will be okay. It just the emotion of it all, and Steve feeling bad as well. I told him I don’t know how he could have done that to us. His reply was, “Ya, I was stupid.”
Yep no doubt about that. A day late and a dollar short. He will never change.
I will be without a computer on Tuesday, and won’t have hook-up until Wednesday evening. 1 whole day without a phone or computer-what did we ever do before technology!
HugsSharron,
You have grown so much, and you are one brave lady. Bravo to you; thank you for inspiring me. We are hear for you, cheering you on, and keeping you close throughout this week and always.
Much love,
ZgSharron,
Thinking of you and want you to know I’m proud of you too. Doing the right thing takes ‘guts’ and you’ve got em. I know it’s painful to do; your pain has moved you in a positive direction. Your life will be free from his craziness. You’re so sweet Sharron, I hope you go back to your dancing again and enjoying life !!!Love you, Nap
Thanks NAP-I was over cleaning my “little” condo today, and I felt such peace. Can’t wait to get back home on Tuesday.
AND, I am going back to dancing.Thanks zumbagirl- Sure as hell took me a long time to get where I’m at, but I finally made it!
It is also a sad time, but that shall pass.
I was cleaning at the Condo and thinking- No more trauma!! Then I wondered how I ever put up with this shit for so long.
I had a good cry last night, but am doing great today.
Steve is having a really rough time-Wish he would have thought of that before he destroyed 3 yrs. of my life. Well, I can’t really say that-I have to take responsibility for allowing it to happen. NEVER AGAIN!!Sharron,
I haven’t witnessed your struggle for as long as some of the other women here, but I sense it was a difficult and long one. You chose YOU! I’m so proud and happy for you.
Remember – be gentle with yourself and take care of yourself as you move. We will be here for you, cheering every step of the way.
Love, Deb xxxxxx
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