- This topic has 33 replies, 13 voices, and was last updated 12 years, 10 months ago by
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Ha!!! You guys CRACK me up!! For real. I can’t get to sleep (notice, it’s 7 a.m. in MY time Zone, and no sleep yet!) ‘Course, I’m in my lonely bedroom at my Dads wishin I was wakin up to that boner in my back! LOL, Deb!!! We have GOT to continue our conversation! I’m sorry I couldn’t call you back a week and a half ago or so…. Then I went to the holler, then on to Savannah..blah, blah!! Just returned to Indy at 3 a.m. And been on SOS ever since! 🙂
On a serious note and back to the blame game- (and I know I repeat myself- but for all the new ladies…..)
At least TEN YEARS AGO, I filed for a divorce (didnt know about SA, just that I was tired of no sex AND I had caught him “just cheating” on me several times.) I was scared to death but last straw, found out he was on a single’s site, etc. I finally gave up and filed. I figured he would be relieved as he hadn’t paid me any mind for YEARS! I gather courage and tell him that night. I am suddenly facing a grown man, on his hands and knees, bawling like a baby (had NEVERRR seen him cry the entire time I knew him) and begging me not to leave him. Swearing he will change, professing his undying love, taking FULL, 100% responsibility for his actions, our problems, etc. Begged, Pleaded, and talked me out of divorce! On best behavior for months… Blah…blah….
At some point, back to same ole shit again, and again, and again! Fast forward to SA comes to light, then the night my head spun around like Carrie….I raged and spit and cussed, etc. Suddenly, in the midst of my rage- I remember “that night” 10 years prior. I screamed- “why didn’t you let me go ten years ago when I filed”!!? You cried and begged and promised and pleaded…. Why didn’t you just let go then!!! His reply???
“You were the one who stayed”.
OMFG, I wanted to kill him with my bare hands! They are RUTHLESS, NARC, ASSHOLES!!
The end.
Wow. “You are the one who stayed.” There’s a huge lesson there, and I’m giving it some serious thought today.
SL. that is an amazing and true story. You stayed–he says? ugh. there is no end to their projectile vomit.
YOu SL. I am not a fan of rage and losing tempers. but in these drastic situations, I think becoming “Carrie” or the “excorcist child” at moments may even be healthy somewhat. I mean years of BS. and what we are supposed to be all calm and rationale 24/7? as long as we don’t get physical with them or anything, I think we are all entitled to blow a gasket here and there.
funny. Nov 2010. he returned from brazil. begged pleaded, cried. talked me out of the divorce. here I am 20 months later. revisiting the same ol shit.
Isn’t it amazing though? when we hear ourselves say things like — before SA. Or he was “just cheating.” I dunno. some poeple have open marriages, or a don’t ask don’t tell agreement. I have heard at my daughter’s elementary that there are couples who “swing.”
i start wondering if I am just too idealistic to expect a married man and wife for that matter, to be faithful to each other. i think it matters.
so does Jackie Collins the author. i know total sidebar– but she was interviewed and said she loves writing about sex and the bedroom and glamourous lives. she said she knows many hollywood types who cheat on their spouses. but for her, and her husband, when she was married, faithfulness matters. that is you want to play around don’t be married.
i think she knows a thing or two about life. and I highly doubt her bedroom is a big bore. go Jackie.
thanks all. I am rambling here.
Its a wonder you are not babbling living with your H, Pam. I will be so glad when you are out of that house. He makes me nervous. When you do get out you will find someone Pam and it will ALL be different… just like it is for the lovely SL and her seriously cute BF. 😉
Thanks KMF. He makes me nervous too. but he has promised to behave, until I can move this summer. while this is a financially prudent move , it is difficult emotionally. I just want it to be over already.
I am somewhat confident that he will play ball. As my staying for few months benefits him financially. but if I feel unsafe, or threatened, I will pull the trigger sooner. whether he has enough money to support himself or not.
NAP!!!
I did NOT say BONE! I said boner! (Actually Debora said it) As in P.e.n.i.s.
When I’m down in the holler, I sleep neked….
Sometimes I wake up in the morning and BF pokes his wackadoodle in the general direction of my butt. (Deb said back…. maybe it IS back and I’m just wishing it was my butt. (NOT.)
Regardless, I think I am suppose to wake up, roll over, and act interested. Instead I swat, burrow under the blankies, and resume snoring…..NOW THAT’S HOT!!!!!!
SL,
I was being funny SL, I know what a boner is just haven’t seen one in a coon’s age. I quess coons live to be old, there are probably coons in ‘the Holler’.Love. Nap
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