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As many of you have noticed there is a problem with starting a ‘New Topic’ After much hand wringing, brain storming and code searching I realized that the problem is a conflict with my custom design and the upgrades that I just recently performed.
I tried using a general default design, but that does not allow for all of the security measures that I have in place for the public front page, so I’m afraid we will have to struggle through without the ability to start a new topic for a few days.
So, I have started this topic to allow each of you to use the comment section like a topic area. I know it may be confusing, but hey, after all that we have been through in our personal lives, this is a piece of cake.
So, just comment below with any stories, issues, etc and then comment back to the person or issue you are addressing.
You can do it! We’ll get through it!
Or, maybe I’ll just get out of the webpage business and be a beach bum for the rest of my life;-)
Much love to all ~ JoAnn
Hi all!! Thought I would start us out by saying hello! This is not really a new topic… I am down in the Tennessee holler this wknd visiting the new BF! Life is good!! I have been thinking about everyone and hope you are doing well! I heard Flora is having a DATE this wknd??!?!! I DO want the dirt on THAT!!
Love to ALL, SLHi All, Dirt will follow. But at the most i hope jsut to survuve without having a coronary and blabbing non stop due to nerves. I hope to survive the nerves. There may not be a date two, however it will be nice to get that “first date since sepearate/waiting for divorce” done with.
Love,
FloraHi flora,
So excited for you. Here are some tips for your consideration:
1. Act hard to get
2. Just show a tad of cleavage
3. Smile alot
4. Pretend to fall down and see if he helps back up
5. Whisper alot
6. Order your food in French. If you dont know French, just use pig Latin.
7. Tell him your uncle works for the FBI.
8. Really have a great time!!!Love, Nap
Thanks Heidi, and Flora will knock off his socks, I agree!!
Sisters,
I have a question and would love your input and opinions. As most you know I am divorcing and we are getting closer to the end. It’s in sight….. YIPEE!!!!!Anyway, what are your opinions about keeping your married name or going back to your maiden name? Thanks!
Love, Miss Nap
nap i went back to my maiden name, i think its a personal choice. for me when i married him i was in love with him, i wanted to have his name. but my husband was not the man he led me to believe. so in reality i had no marriage not real, not the man whos name i took. i was worried because my kids are all carrying his name, but my daughter said that it really didnt matter what name i have, she said if i ever remarried your name would change anyway. so for me i guess he didnt deserve me carrying his name.
I don’t know what to do myself. My maiden name was one I had to spell a thousand times and nobody ever got it right anyway. And I’ve published a lot under my married name, so I’d like to build on that. I’m probably just going to keep it. One less piece of administration to change.
I don’t think it’s anything that anyone can decide for you. I agree with Katt– a personal choice. I read this fun tip the other day: if you have an either/or decision, flip a coin. In the moment before you reveal heads/tails, listen to what your heart is telling you what you wish it was.
Personally, I’d probably go the route of Diane for practical reasons. If/when the time comes, I’d be going back to a very long, hard to spell, hard to pronounce Slovak name. That being said, I’m sure it’s entirely likely my whole view could change when it’s a reality. Yup, definitely going to use the coin flipping approach! 🙂Hi guys, made it home just fine. I did play hard to get, well i am hard to get, so was not all an act. I had to go home. But had a nice time. No major bells, but was nice to feel i had a good read on the guy. He did hold my hand to walk through the snow on a hill. So he passed that. I did not order anything in french, however i did tell him my complete and total lack of ability to leanr languages. Oh and wait he is about nine years younger than me…ouch. He guessed i was about 34….ouch wrong again. If he calls i would go out again. However you know what,,,i am just fine. and yes i am hot. Anywho. I should order drop dead sexy, and he would have cried when i left to go home.
Love you all sisters…
FloraYay Flo!! Way to pass the test On your first date! You did it and you survived!! Awesome!! So happy nothing crazy happened!! Ha!! Thinking OF YOU!!!! Xoxoxo!!
You cougar, you!!!
My guy is 5 years younger!
Meow!!!Nap,
I went back to maiden name (to prove a point more than anything) and whole process is a pain in the ass, just FYI………………. I wouldn’t recommend!!Just to put in my two cents. I will go back to my maiden name even though it is hard to spell . There is nothing honorable that I can associate with my maried name with and want to get as far away as I can from the reminder.
PS – if you are going to go back to your maiden name, make sure your attorney puts it in your divorice decree. This way you do not have to pay an attorney to do this latter – will save you money.
After my first divorce i kept my married name. My old last name was bender, and i got made fun of horribly in school for it. So i kept eller married name, and also was nice so me and the kids had the same last name, people would know i am there mom. I never took second h’s hame, i never legally changed it. In the end most recently i had wanted to change it back to bender, just so i could go back to where i started per say. But it did not happen. So who knows where i will end up int he future if i do want to change it. I wanted to have it changed before a job change, so no one would have to ask why. So i figure i will be stuck with it as is for quite a while. But when we divorce we are allowed to re-invent ourselves, name and all.
hi silver, yes thats me i guess, a cougar, its not the first time. Sometimes younger guys seem to chase us down. And in our defense we look so young 🙂 He was a real nice guy though. Wicked smart too.
You go girl!! I think it’s great!!
Remember, my big love affair, that lasted 2 1/2 years (new ladies-check out my story under “Read it and Weep”,) was with a guy that was 13 years younger and he DID chase me down!! Ahhh… He was hot as hell too!!! >:) We’re actually still very good friends and I’m glad!! 🙂
Hi Jeanette,
ALWAYS nice to hear from you!! I understand your reasons of wanting to change and those were some of mine as well!! But, I’m just saying- its a big pain in the ass!! Ugh!!
And after all of that- my new BF that says I just wasted my time because it’s won’t be long until HE convinces me to marry HIM!! I groaned so loud, he said I wouldn’t have to change my name!! Ha!Hi Flora,
So nice you had a great time!!!!Thanks all for the name changing opinions and tips.
My maiden name, I always had to spell and pronounce to people. My married name is one of the most common last names on earth and after I married I thought this it’s what it’s like to have an easy last name.Much like SL and Jeannette I feel very strongly about not being asdividers with it because in my mind we really were never married. He didn’t keep our marriage vows fro
day #1.My lawyer did say as Jeannette said to put it in the decree because then it’s free. As SL said, my lawyet said it’s a big hassle esp if you’ve been married a long time. So I’m still thinking about it.
If anyone else has an opinion I’d appreciate it. Thanks sisters!
Love, happy and almost single, Nap
HI Flora,
way to go, sister!
I’m really glad it wasn’t a “get me outta here” thing. You totally rock the cougar tracks. But what matters most is that you feel okay, maybe even good.
So he was nice AND wicked smart—always a plus. Listen I think we are all bustin out proud of you. It takes courage and confidence to step out. But you’ve been doing your work, Flora, so trust yourself. Keep us posted.
D.xoHa! Ha!! Yay, Nap! Almost single!! 🙂
I did have mine put in decree. There is just so much to it! I decided to do driver license, social security card, and bank… Then every thing else as I go along! (still a pain and people act stupid about it!) imagine THAT!!
(but we’re use to idiots acting stupid, – catatonic, glazed over, robot, etc)
nap like sl i did the main things. my credit cards i just called didnt really have a problem. i was married for 20+ years to him. the little things like magazines and such i didnt worry about. it was a pain but it has also helped me in the long run. his name is very different and when he died he left allot of debt. since my name is no longer same it didnt seem to connect to me as easily. i think many people use google to track down names. for me the name change was important as i no longer felt i belonged to him.
Katt,
I feel the same way as you described with your first h. I really like my current name I just wish my h wasn’t associated with it. Plus I think of my kids and having a different name from them makes me kinda said. I haven’t decided yet. I still have time. I told my lawyer I’m going to miss her when my divorce is over. Shes one of the neatest and hard working People I’ve ever met. She tolde o could come and visit and hang out once in a while.Love, Miss Nap
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