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GG,
A belated welcome to SOS and I concur with everyone that you are in shock. The brains way of protecting you right now. Im sorry to hear about you h secret life, it’s very painful. I’m 2 yrs out from discovery and now happily divorced 8 months. Mine was super crazy and still likely is. I wish you all the best. All the women here are wonderful and we understand each other, sadly but helpfully.
Love, NapGeorgiagirl,
My dad was from Georgia, he loved it there.
Sorry so very late in saying welcome. I cannot add much to the great advice from the sisters. In the beginning things take a while to sink in, and feelings come back and when they do we’ll be here to listen.
I think I didn’t really start to feel my anger until my STBXSAH was gone to TX and I was left in NC. It was really odd to me it took that, maybe because then I felt safer. Mine is a scary one.
Hugs and welcome
Georgiegirl, I can relate to your situation. I had protected sex too. I was tested and all ok. In the months that followed my husband was tested twice (every three months) I believed him when he said he hadn’t been physical with anyone. in december we had unprotected sex. I just wanted it to feel normal again. putting the condom on always reminded me of the situation I was in. 5 days later I found evidence on his phone of meeting a hooker earlier in December. It made me sick to my stomach and so mad at myself. I left the next day. I realized that I can never trust him. When it comes to sex if I were to ever find myself with him again, I would remind myself that if I ever got a disease and couldn’t care for my son, then he would care for my son. That’s enough motivation to me to never allow such a situation again. Just whatever you do, please please hold the line on this.
Hi Georgia,
I’m so so sorry that your are here and your little family is compromised by your husband’s SA. I am with my husband and I am trying to make it work. It has been 3 years and I have struggled along making small improvements (maybe). I think I was a student in a school I would be classified as ‘special needs’ I am still trying to get my head around things and the sisters are helping me with this. The advice is often very hard for me to take and I have little tantrums sometimes but I know their advice is good and it truly comes from the best place and their own experiences. You are fortunate that you should be able to find a good therapist in the US. Please check with the sisters first to make sure they are good. Your progress I’m sure will be much faster than mine as we don’t have any decent therapists in Australia. Don’t worry about the way you are feeling. This is so traumatic and new to you. xoxo
Georgia Girl, I am 2 1/2 weeks into the realization I have been married to a man 12 years and “dunked” into the reality that he really is the stranger that he turned into overnight. I am just piecing together what a sex addict really is and joining this site has been the single most important thing I have done that has helped me get a grasp on this new reality objectively without turning it on myself. These ladies are smart and incredibly kind and you have definitely come to the right place. A cloud has lifted a little off my head in the last two days….this is the best place to get your sea legs…..
I’m so sorry that you’re going through this. You have found the place of true understanding and support.
What you are experiencing is shock. The most important thing now is to do whatever you need to take care of yourself. You have suffered a very deep trauma. When I first found out about this I was told not to make any big decisions because I wasn’t in the emotional place to do anything. You may need some space from your SAH so that you can think more clearly.
Remember this is NOT your fault in any way. We are all here for youWelcome Georgiagirl, so sorry to hear what you are going through. So sorry for your kids too. This is a tough and challenging time for you all and so much to absorb without time to prepare for this shock to say the least. I am just so glad you found this site. This is the right place to be, I am sending you hugs from South Africa. I would never have survived without the friendship and support I have found from these wonderful sisters. Take care dear.
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