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- This topic has 11 replies, 8 voices, and was last updated 11 years, 2 months ago by
maryreddy.
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December 4, 2013 at 3:38 am #8815
maryreddy
ParticipantMy final trial is set for the end of January, we have a court order for a Psych Eval. I need a crash course. I am in Sauk County Wisconsin. I have been trying to divorce my SA for 2 years. Any tips??
December 4, 2013 at 4:35 am #118874alicemarie
ParticipantI have one coming up too- I feel like im going to fail from all the stress, but my ex abuser sa will pass with flying colors I’m sure. I am shocked how he charms people and is so cool and appear so normal- it’s so crazy.
Good luck Mary- I wish I could help. If mine comes before yours I will give you a heads up on it’s like.
December 4, 2013 at 1:51 pm #118875march
ParticipantI’d recommend answering all the questions based on what is/was characteristic of you before the trauma of SA. For instance, I am at my core a trusting, rational, even-tempered person. But if I answered questions based on my feelings and responses post d-day, I just MIGHT come across as a raging, paranoid, freakazoid. That’s not me–it’s my trauma symptoms.
Picture yourself at a time in your life when you were most YOU, then answer the questions the way SHE would.
December 4, 2013 at 2:55 pm #118876lynng2
ParticipantAnyone who can get away with a secret life as long as these guys can lie like a pro. They can put on and take off personalities and even believe the show themselves. They have lived all this time learning how NOT to be exposed and vulnerable.
That is part of this that is so awful, the testing and questioning and digging into our sexual selves and psychological selves when our whole world is turned upside down and crushed. In my experience, it just felt like therapist assisted gaslighting.
I like March’s advice. What we are in the midst of this shock and destruction is not who we are, it’s how we survive short term.
December 4, 2013 at 3:00 pm #118877972
MemberMarch’s advice is spot on and my H took a psych eval at Minwalla’s and it was 100% accurate.
December 4, 2013 at 3:09 pm #118878teri
ParticipantI can’t tell you much about dr e’s bc of confidentiality, but let’s just say that he came out as the wonderful, honest, nothing to hide kind of guy and said much of what I have heard over and over before that I know is not true.
My trauma was recognized as such.
December 4, 2013 at 4:53 pm #118879nap
ParticipantI think I had one once and I passed.
December 4, 2013 at 5:02 pm #118880972
MemberI won’t take one ever because I am pretty positive I would be labeled stark raving crazy 🙂
This is not good advice ( or advice at all) but I am afraid I would be so angry that I would write FUCK YOU across the test and leave……
I guess then they could label me as an angry potty mouth?
Mary, seriously, if I had to do it for the divorce or to protect my kids then I would truly do what March said.
December 4, 2013 at 5:06 pm #118881nap
ParticipantMe too Mary!
December 4, 2013 at 5:44 pm #118882lynng2
ParticipantLOL, I love that Bev.
December 4, 2013 at 6:33 pm #118883kmf
MemberYes, March is right. Answer as who you are and not who he tried to make you.
December 5, 2013 at 4:40 am #118884maryreddy
ParticipantI love my SOS family! Thank you for the great supportive advice! I hope SAndy doesn’t trigger me on one of eval days …then I would definitely be what Bev wrote: angry & bitter. I think having a friend with benefits before my eval might help — it’s been 3 years. 😀 Does the trauma side ever heal?
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