Home discussions Funny Stuff So he now has a goatee

Viewing 25 posts - 1 through 25 (of 79 total)
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  • #6044
    lynng2
    Participant

    OMG!!! This so so funny. My STBXSAH texted to inform me that IF he happens to visit at Thanksgiving (though I told him it’s NOT a good idea) while he’s here to see his daughter, I should be aware he’s “experimenting with a beard”. I texted back, is it a goatee? He texted back, yes, I’m just trying it out. LMFAO

    A 6’4″ balding man with glasses and a goatee, who weighs less than I do. How much more frigging obvious a creep could you be. DAMN I wish he had been “experimenting” with this when we first met. Never would have gone to date #2.

    Geez.

    Not an original bone in their bodies.

    Especially not THAT bone.

    #59706
    teri
    Participant

    He’s joined the same club as my STBX. I’m just shaking my head.

    #59707
    lynng2
    Participant

    He DID, and he’s even now NOT doing any recovery, but in a private “counseling” relationship with a catholic priest who is helping him get back on “the path”.

    LMFAO

    #59708
    lynng2
    Participant

    I replied “Why not, just go ahead and flash it, babe.”

    #59709
    teri
    Participant

    Really, we should introduce our DA’s. They are made for each other.

    #59710
    lynng2
    Participant

    They so are

    #59711
    972
    Member

    There is something to the creepy goatee thing…

    Avoid skinny men with goatees.

    #59712
    lynng2
    Participant

    I looked it up and it’s just vile, and EXACTLY what my STBXSAH would want to do. EXACTLY. IF he makes an appearance, I will simply not be able to keep from belly laughing at him. Knowing that’s what it’s for, and he’s a 54 year old guy flashing that out for the “informed public (pubic is more like it)” to see.

    #59713
    972
    Member

    I tried to google the whole thing and can’t really find anything definitive. I just know that mine would grow one randomly and my daughter and I both hated it….

    It was creepy.

    #59714
    diane
    Participant

    He has a goatee because he is a goat.
    Or because that’s what’s he fucking these days?

    #59715
    teri
    Participant

    My STBX and his attorney accused me of telling my son that dad’s a pedophile because he has a goatee. It takes everything I have not to say “Hey, pedophile!” every time he comes to the door these days.

    One day, he had a conversation with (more like at) my son (on my front porch) about maybe shaving it down to a soul patch. This is a 47 year old professional- grow up. I wanted to say, “It will match your pubic soul patch- how cute!”

    #59716
    march
    Participant

    Diane, that was my first laugh of the day.

    When Teri’s h grew his and we talked about goatees the first time, I started googling to see if there was any significance to it in terms of sexual activity (was it a signal?). I couldn’t find anything more than the usual ‘facial hair is considered a sign of virility’ shit. BUT I did get routed to a million swinger sites/ads where the man was described as having a goatee. So lovely.

    #59717
    kmf
    Member

    I didn’t think I had a naive bone left in my body BUT I have no bloody idea what a man does with a goatee and I have never heard anything about them either? Of course….maybe only depraved people know about goatee and soul patches. What the hell is that? LOL

    #59718
    teri
    Participant

    Goatee-
    Urban dictionary
    “A particular beard and mustach that is grown for the
    pleasure of the few women who know what it is there for. “
    See alsooral sex cunnlingus face sitting queening muffdive eat pussy

    also knows as prison pussy or facial pubes.

    #59719
    teri
    Participant

    ride the goatee
    To receive oral sex from someone who has a goatee.

    Another name- Pussy tickler

    #59720
    teri
    Participant

    Unfortunately, my porn blocker won’t let me go to swingerology.com, but apparently there is an entry for goatee.

    #59721
    teri
    Participant

    And it’s scientifically proven that they are creepy…

    http://io9.com/5914836/scientists-prove-that-a-goatee-makes-you-look-evil

    And here’s another one I can’t open but it looks interesting
    Hairless cocks/pussies and the goatee paradox – Adult Forum
    http://www.sexforums.com/…/122531-hairless-cockspussies-and-the-goatee…
    20 posts – 8 authors – Jun 23
    Hairless cocks/pussies and the goatee paradox: In all the shaving pubic hair threads, there are folks claiming they do it because of hygiene

    #59722
    kmf
    Member

    Dear Lord….well…I asked? LOL

    #59723
    march
    Participant

    Obviously, my own research was lacking.

    #59724
    debinca
    Participant

    Remember my post about how to tell if it’s fake recovery? We can add “if they grow a goatee” to the list. Oh – and let’s not forget if they buy a motorcycle and find God. And if they stop to see a hooker on the way to their 12 step meeting.

    Funny thing – my SAH soon after he came out of the SA closet (he calls it “opening up the cupboard”) ordered a leather wrist band and leather necklace (supposedly to carry his epilepsy meds). Looks strange. He went to Berkeley to find one but then bought a really expensive one online.

    Deb

    #59725
    liza
    Participant

    How gay is THAT, seriously.

    #59726
    teri
    Participant

    Deb, that alone is grounds for divorce in my book. 🙂

    #59727
    nap
    Participant

    Diane, youre funny!!!

    Yep we need a poll to find out what percentage of the SOS sisters h or xh had or have a goatee. I think it’s pretty high. It makes sense, they shave their pubes then grow a goatee to balance things out. Ying and yang. Kinda.

    #59728
    972
    Member

    Wow, just wow….

    I will add that my H would have to grow a goatee and pay a hooker to be considered “good” at that particular sexual act 🙂

    Bless his heart….

    #59729
    march
    Participant

    Ha!

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