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I joined this site after being separated and divorced for almost a year. I originally thought I just needed somewhere to vent my lingering grief. But it has been so much more to me than that. I am understanding more and more about what went on in my marriage and in me. It helps me so much because I ended my marriage very quickly after d day, and my ex would not discuss any of it for one minute. So I have had to do all the processing by myself.
All of your stories and posts are so enlightening and validating. Thank you! And thank you, JoAnne, for starting this site.
Good luck to you, Polly. It is such a relief to find women that feel the one-sided grief that you do. I have told the counselors that it would be somehow simpler to isolate a dark period in our marriage where we weren’t communicating and things went wrong for a while and identify that particular time and address our malfunction and move on. But to find out that there was a parallel universe that kind of invalidates all that you think you two were is just too hard to explain to anyone that hasn’t been there. People that love us try, but they just can’t know the tortuous thoughts that circulate in our brains. There is the hope of healing for all of us though, and a richer life ahead.
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