What to do, hmm

Packing my bag and getting ready to leave. Just now starting to get a little nervous. I’m thinking of taking a half of xanax.

My SA is surprised that I’m actually doing this. He’s beside himself that I’m not freaking out and that I’m actually looking forward to an adventure without him! He’s acting like he’s hurting, he just took two ibuprofen. Says his back hurts really bad. Oh well! See ya! Have fun taking care of 3 dogs, 2 donkeys, 1 horse, and 4 cats! Don’t forget to feed them, put their fly masks on, brush them, check for boo boo’s! Oh yeah, and clean the pens and pick up poo. 🙂

I’ll be singing “on the road again!” “just can’t wait to get on the road again!”

Seriously, I hope the day goes well and that I don’t stress out.

Much love ladies, Claire

Well, it was an adventure! But I made it there with time to spare and got home around 8:30 pm.

In a nut shell; I don’t need a tendon transfer surgery as was first suspected. So that’s good news. I do need a rotator cuff repair surgery that will be done differently than done before using better anchors and re-attaching the tendon to the bone in a much different location. The surgery is an outpatient surgery so I will be able to come home the same day. It will be done arthroscopically, meaning small incisions and using instruments with cameras attached. The shoulder will also need to be “released” as it has become encapsulated with tissue that’s causing the range of motion to be very limited which has caused me much stiffness, weakness, and overall pain when I try to use it much. To do that they simply cut through the tissue to release the capsule. I should have much better results with this surgery. I’ll be able to do all follow-up doctor appointments and physical therapy here in my town with my regular orthopedic surgeon.

Glad to be home. will have to unwind a bit before I try to get some sleep. But, I made it there and back without Xanax. It was a good trip for me and another step in my ambition to become more strong, face my fears, and be able to regain some confidence in myself.

Thank you all for making this journey with me. I felt your strength with me all day.

Much love, Claire

Thanks sisters. I do feel good about yesterday. Last night i barely got any sleep. maybe it was from the adrenalin cursing through my veins as I held white knuckled to the steering wheel for a total of 6 hours yesterday! That really took a toll on my shoulders and my back. Today, i am totally wiped out. SA just left for the day and won’t be back till late tonight because he has an SA meeting tonight. So, God willing, the dogs will be quiet and I can just relax, veg, and maybe even take a nap. No pun intended NAP!

You all have been incredibly supportive and I really appreciate it. I realize how big these little steps are for me. Even my Mom 3,000 miles away, sent me an email saying she was proud of me for making that trip. That’s saying something!

There’s alot going on in this forum and I hate to take up space when others are having really rough times. I guess we are all just in different phases and just talking about it here, makes all the difference in the world. So I’ll keep posting and I’ll keep responding to others where i think I have something of worth to say.

God bless JoAnn and all she has been through, to have had the brainstorm to create this site. JoAnn, I hope you realize how many people love and appreciate you.

Much love, Claire