rita

my live in ex boyfriend of 3years i found out is what is being called these days a sex addict. i have survived a tremendous amount if trauma prior to my involvement with him, and yet thus trauma has caused such a pathetic desperation that i am longing even to get back together with him to ease the still raw feeling of pain im in. i found out after a year and a half tigether and then the 2nd year and a half was therapy indiv. couples and support groups 5nights a week. i long for his arms around me while i sweat through the visuals i still get the way he used, promusing ne ge’s going to fix all this. he lied tremenously when i first discovered so my visuals are very detailed due to my constant searching to get the truths. i feel permanently damaged. im 40yrs old and i cant stand myself wanting him back because of “all the work he did do” like placing a trace on his idevice, etc. please sisters help me not rem the “goodness” he is capable of and want it back so insanely.
thank you