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My boss (God love her) referred me to an attorney friend of hers familiar with dealing with psychos. I told him the crazy events going on in my home. Latest threat of violence.
He knows a judge and is calling him to talk about restraining order being filed even though we live under same roof.
SAH has no idea of counsel I am getting. I am playing along as normal , in house seperation, etc. keeping it calm as I can. let you know what he advises.
The picture ain’t pretty. He told me there are 10’s of thousands of marriages and couples in similar situations. Damned if you do, damned if you don’t. I told him that without camera proof I don’t think a judge will believe me and it will be he said / she said. Plus I told him about my arrest 10 years ago (no conviction) for an argument btw me and H. I told him how much H uses that against me, saying I will look like violent one. No one will believe etc, etc etc.
Attorney said this. People get arrested all the time. It doesn’t matter squat. No priors, no other arrests. DONE. Told me I just need an attorney who is not going to put up with his nonsense. keep you all posted.
Good for you, Pam. You are smart and strong and I’ll bet you can be a good little actress while you get yourself protected.
Sounds like you are ready.
Sending the angels for protection,
Debora
Hi Pam
If you get the order, which is very smart BTW, I don’t think you can live under the same roof because there is usually a distance defined in the order and a judge may think it’s a bit goofy to grant a restraining order with both parties under the same roof. It may appear illogical from that standpoint of the court. Be aware as I’m sure you well know this could trigger his rage and that’s when you call the police from a safe distance away and tell them what happened. Pam I know this must be Sooo stressful! Thinking of you and your daughter. I just wish you could make a clean, fast break.Love, Nap
Pam, seconding Naps post, especially that I am thinking of you! I also think when a restraining order is in place and you live together, they are going to force him to leave…
pam have you talked to any one from a woman shelter. they are very good they know what to do. i was in a very bad place with my first husband they were very helpful.a restraining order is only as good as someone who follows it. my husband did not and would not.
thanks all. here’s the thing in all this, I NEED TO START SOMEWHERE OR NOTHING WILL CHANGE. I WILL LIVE WITH ABUSE FOREVER. THE END. Now I am not sure if the restraining order is the way I am going to go or not, I am waiting on attorney. But, if nothing is done, nothing will change. He will rage, abuse and be an addict. I will die young. lose all respect from my child for staying. even if the restraining order is only as good as paper, it IS something. and violation of it means they get arrested and can face jail time. again, evidence body worn camera, etc to show proof. I cannot play. And I am not a good actress. He is dangerous, violent, and capable of harm. I am frightened. no drama. no acting. I should be frightened. I really honestly need protection. I need him to be out of the house. but i have to tread carefully.
pam would you like to talk please call me or im your number i have been there trust me 20+ years of it. he broke my jaw he handcuffed, me to radiators, once i couldn’t walk. im really worried for you and your child
sorry pam my daughter showed up had to log off im in wv my number is 304-449-1842 im here most of the time just let me know a good time and ill call you
much love kattYou will not die young, Pam.
You are on your way to your real life. Every single step you take toward is more powerful that you can ever know. Going to the lawyer was one of those steps. Already the tectonic plates are shifting underneath your life, moving you to a different place. Debora has sent the angels. Your future is coming to you and your daughter. Trust the goodness of life. It’s real. You are closer than you think.OMG Pam. I am so nervous. I am putting my faith in Diane’s words. Sometimes we must move ahead with nothing but faith. God watch over you and your daughter. Karen xx
Thinking of YOU, Pam! Please stay in touch with us! Let us know what you need! You have your army of sisters behind you! (thank you, Marie for those famous words!)
XOXOXO!!!
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