- This topic has 28 replies, 12 voices, and was last updated 12 years, 12 months ago by
.
-
Posts
-
WOW!
Helen—you have posted the very first story of help and healing from a professional source of treatment!!!
This is HUGE! Thank you. We need to hear your story so badly. Has Dr. Minwalla written a book?BTW, March’s therapist finally posted my third post and rewrote his article, which I still think is crap. Let’s face it, it took me three posts to get him to that point. Other’s would have given up by then.
Helen, I am so glad you found comfort in that intensive. What you said here, “The day everything blew-and i mean my mind-i felt it explode-i have felt untreated,” sums it all up perfectly.
Trailrider, I love this! “Not to sound flippant but if dealing with your spouse’s sex addiction is considered to be ANYWHERE along the road of building character I choose to cast my lot with the shallow people thank you.” xoxo
“When a person experiences a life crisis, much of what was once familiar is no longer recognizable”
No truer statement. However, I don’t completely see his qualification of ‘big’ and ‘little’ Ts.
For me, the process of the PTSD effects of SA to a partner are quite different from what he characterizes as the ‘big ts’, in the opposite direction. Even though his ‘big Ts’ are sudden an traumatic, there is some general understanding of the ‘natural’ recovery methods and defined stages of recovering from them. The self is hurt, but the fundamental basis for its very existence is not threatened (in every situation), making recovery much easier to understand.
SA partner PTSD is a new beast. The process of questioning everything you have conceptualized as healthy relationships, warning signs, EVERYTHING relational, rocks you to the core. You are forced to go back to day one (or try) and question the validity of ALL your experiences, and the way you have perceived and dealt with them.
Even when you somewhat accept the concept of sexual addiction being outside your creation or control, all aspects of surrounding life are immediately threatening (media, strangers, family acquaintances).
I developed panic attacks due to this, and I would think that would not be an uncommon reaction.Even if you don’t perceive yourself as ‘defined’ by having a man or your self as being based on this, all aspects of your self and its competency are flung into the whirlwind of uncertainty.
I would like to hear the opinion of a therapist that has experience from the partner perspective. I don’t think it would be distinguished the same.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.